Sunshine On a Stem : :

On Tuesday we took a drive all together to get some things we needed and some we didn't, which is just how it goes I suppose. On our way a flash of bright yellow caught my eye at the very same farm stand I stopped at last year, at this very same time. Thoughts of last year's Spring have been heavy on my heart lately and though this blog has never been so much about my personal life, as my creative - I decided sharing today will explain a little of the answer to why I have been creating so much more this year.

 
This time last year, my close friend Leslie was battling her cancer. On a day just like today I brought her a bouquet of daffodils from that farm stand, in this same old mason jar. The bright yellow reminded me of the color of her daughters hair, which I couldn't believe the first time I saw it ~ strands of sunshine. I shared that thought with her and she smiled and I'll never forget that. I can't write the details of how difficult and delicate the memories of that time are for me and those closest to Leslie, but sadly we lost her May 6th. Leslie is and was so many things. She is Leah's mother, a wonderfully creative girl that I mention here often. The first fellow mother I really felt a connection with. A teacher to me of so many things - loyal friendship, unbelievable strength and courage, sweet kindness, amazing faith, everything I know about flowers, and so much more.

 
For many months I avoided all that I could that would make me think of how much I missed her, including spending much time creating. I couldn't handle the thinking that came along with just sitting quietly and working. And then one day I decided to stop waiting for things to get back to "normal" because that just doesn't happen. Instead, I chose to take notice to the many things about Leslie that have influenced me. 

So now, very often and all of the sudden, I'll feel those things floating around me, quietly directing me as influences do. She makes me want to be a better person, mother, and friend. She reminds me to see all the little things and how pretty everything is. Especially when it's shared, which is a huge part as to why I am sharing here. And lately I'm hearing her whisper the names of the flowers she gave to me, as I look each day to see what's poking through the ground.
 
 
These flowers feel like her now that she is gone. Every spring when they'll come up and as they open to blooms they will remind me of my friends' wonderful spirit. It all makes me feel just a little closer to her.  A reminder to enjoy the sunshine!